Section 1.1: The Turning Point

Inspired by Jon Klassen’s delightful book “We Found A Hat,” I returned from a work trip, eager to understand my confusing blood test results. A close friend, a mother of two, had urged me to confirm my positive pregnancy test with a blood test. Soon after, I was called in for a scan, where my friend accompanied me. We saw a baby on the screen, but sadly, no heartbeat.

Days later, during a solitary visit, a healthcare professional confirmed my fears: I was going to miscarry. Though I was devastated, her compassionate words offered me hope: “In a few years, you’ll have many little ones running around!” I left the clinic holding onto that optimism, despite the concerned looks from expectant mothers.

Part Two: Understanding Miscarriage

According to the World Health Organization, 10 to 15% of women who realize they are pregnant will experience a miscarriage—over one in ten pregnancies. As I opened up about my experience, I noticed that many others resonated with these statistics.

I felt fortunate to have been warned, allowing me to prepare for the time I’d need to take off work. Even at nine weeks, the experience was physically demanding, involving prolonged discomfort and significant emotional turmoil.

Surprisingly, when the bleeding began, it wasn’t as painful as I had anticipated. Having previously dealt with painful menstrual cycles, I was relieved to find this process manageable. However, I soon felt guilty for taking three days off, mistakenly believing I would recover quickly.

Part Three: Coping with the Aftermath

The physical pains that followed the miscarriage were undeniable. My body had to readjust, and sleep became elusive. The exhaustion was overwhelming, making me feel as though I had aged significantly overnight.

Ten days later, it was challenging to explain to my six-year-old nephew why I couldn’t join in the fun of playing ball. If society were more open about miscarriage, it could alleviate some burdens by offering support and guidance, such as avoiding heavy lifting and ensuring ample rest.

Although my family was there for me, explaining my needs felt like yet another challenge.

Part Four: Prioritizing Health

After a follow-up scan, I was relieved to learn that my body had cleared itself of any remaining tissue, and I wouldn’t require further medical intervention. This moment allowed me to focus on healing before trying for another baby, which included visiting a chiropractor and taking time off to rest.

I warmly recommend these self-care practices to anyone in a similar situation.

Part Five: Welcoming New Beginnings

Then, the miracle I longed for materialized. My subsequent pregnancy was a joyous experience, though it wasn’t without its worries. I faced various concerns, from potential complications to reassuring check-ups.

Preparation is key for a full-term pregnancy and healthy delivery, as the journey comes with a myriad of conflicting advice. It’s crucial to stand your ground and voice your needs.

The Takeaway

While medical assistance is invaluable, this experience highlighted the importance of trusting your instincts. You are the best judge of your feelings. Advocate for the care you need, especially during pregnancy. This includes seeking support from family and the community, regular check-ups, and expressing your concerns openly.

From the moment you become pregnant, you involve others in your journey. Don’t hesitate to share your news and seek help when necessary. I hope my story resonates with other women facing similar challenges and their loved ones who wish to provide support.

In this TEDx talk, Regan Parker discusses the impact of miscarriage and the importance of open conversations surrounding this topic.

This video provides insights into early pregnancy failure, shedding light on the experiences many women face.