Chapter 1: Understanding Success and Happiness

A well-known author encapsulated a pivotal idea in just twelve words:

"Success is obtaining what you desire. Happiness is desiring what you have" — Dale Carnegie.

For many years, I equated success with my income, material possessions, and social standing. In Carnegie's terms, it was about acquiring what I wanted. During those moments of achievement, I felt elated; conversely, when I fell short, I experienced disappointment, a sentiment that occurred more frequently than I'd like to admit.

This was a flawed perspective that I fortunately managed to shift several years ago, redefining both my concept of success and my overall happiness.

Now, my understanding of success resonates more closely with Ralph Waldo Emerson's view:

"What is success? To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived."

The transformation from a focus on wealth, possessions, and status to an emphasis on presence, connection, and love has been gradual yet significant. Interestingly, this change occurred after I had achieved a degree of financial stability and accumulated possessions, allowing me to step out of survival mode.

As I shifted my mindset from one of desperation and grasping, I found that abundance returned to me effortlessly. This transition enabled me to move from a mindset of wanting to one of having, and from a doing-oriented mentality to simply being.

It's important to note that while money and possessions can still influence my mood occasionally, they no longer dictate my mental well-being in the same way. I now approach life with gratitude for what I possess, cherishing it for as long as it remains.

"The chance to be part of this happens briefly. The invitation is not to show how inventive and imaginative you are but how much you can notice what you're already part of. And appreciate it and share it and care about those that are around who count for their welfare while you are looking out for your own. That's it. And then you'll get to the end of it having had an awesome time."

— Burgs

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