Chapter 1: The Struggles of Purpose

In times of uncertainty, I often find myself pondering the reasons behind my actions. It feels as though I'm merely existing, lacking a true understanding of my motivations. Sure, achieving high grades and forming new relationships might pave the way for a better job and increased income, but what follows? Will that lead to genuine happiness and satisfaction?

A wise saying goes, “A prudent person should have wealth in their mind, not in their heart.” — Jonathan Swift.

It's all too easy to fall into the trap of believing that success and financial security guarantee joy. Society bombards us with the notion that diligence and accomplishments are the keys to true happiness. I once believed this too until a series of life-altering events unfolded.

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Throughout my childhood, I spent countless hours with my grandfather, never considering that our moments together would eventually end. In hindsight, I often took that time for granted, prioritizing my studies over our relationship. So when my mother received the heartbreaking call from my weeping grandmother, we were left in disbelief.

“He’s gone,” she stated. To which my mom replied, “Where did he go?” That moment captured just how unexpected it was.

For an extended period, I found myself questioning everything, gripped by the fear that life could vanish as abruptly as he did.

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The fear of further loss loomed over me. Each evening, the vacant chair between my mother and grandmother at dinner served as a constant reminder of what was lost. For a long time, I convinced myself that he was still present in some form.

However, a shift occurred. During a business conference, my father called—a rarity in itself. With shaking hands, I answered, and he simply uttered, “We received her diagnosis.”

That moment shattered my already fragile world and compelled me to confront my innermost fears. Faced with this shocking news, I felt adrift and overwhelmed, unsure of how to proceed. It was then that I allowed myself to fully experience the grief I had been suppressing, ultimately finding the strength to move forward. I recognized that the life I was living during that period was not genuinely mine; it was a reflection of my lingering fears.

I had become so engrossed in the pursuit of success that I lost sight of what truly mattered to me. My own needs and desires were neglected, as I built a life shaped by external expectations.

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Realizing this was both daunting and liberating. It was frightening to acknowledge that my life was not genuinely my own, but it was empowering to understand that I had the ability to change my circumstances.

I began to examine what genuinely brought me happiness and fulfillment. I started prioritizing my own needs and letting go of the fears that had been holding me back.

This journey was challenging, and there were times when I felt lost and uncertain. Yet, as I initiated changes and took risks, I felt more vibrant and authentic than ever before.

Photo by Daniel Mirlea on Unsplash

One misfortune can break you, but two can lead to renewal. After confronting the diagnosis, I learned that suffering and loss could serve as catalysts for growth and transformation. It is through these trials that we uncover our strength and resilience.

Ultimately, life is not about the possessions we accumulate or the accolades we receive. It centers on the love we share and the connections we forge. When faced with challenges, we possess the power to reconstruct ourselves and create a life that is authentic and true to our core.

We might feel lost at times, but we are never truly gone.

Chapter 2: Music as a Healing Force

In the song "Lost" by Dermot Kennedy, we find a poignant reminder of the struggles of feeling adrift yet hopeful. The music serves as a therapeutic outlet, allowing listeners to connect with their emotions and experiences.

The second video, "I May Have Lost The Battle Against Them, But I Won't Lose The....." explores resilience in the face of adversity. It encourages viewers to embrace their struggles as part of their journey towards healing and growth.